Koska tuo aiempi postaus liittyi hipsterien isiin, voisin tässä vielä julkaista ainejärjestömme lehteen kirjoittamani "muotijutun" (paino heittomerkeillä). Koska aiemmin olen
leijunut huudellut englannin kielen taitojeni mahtavuutta, ehkä on aika todistaa että a) en ole niin hyvä kuin luulen mutta b) en myöskään ihan paska. Juttu on
yritetty kirjoittaa sarkastiseen sävyyn, mutta jos joku äidin pikku höpönassu siitä siipeensä ottaa, olen jo näin etukäteen pahoillani. Mutta.... Hyvät naiset ja herra(t), ollos hyvä!
GET THE HIPSTER LOOK
Hipster:
\hip-stur\n. One who possesses tastes, social attitudes, and opinions deemed cool by the cool. (Note: it is no longer recommended that one use the term "cool"; a Hipster would instead say "deck.") The Hipster walks among the masses in daily life but is not a part of them and shuns or reduces to kitsch anything held dear by the mainstream. A Hipster ideally possesses no more than 2% body fat. (urbandictionary.com)
Many of the new students at the English Department or furthermore in the Faculty of Humanities may struggle with finding the appropriate look to blend in with their peeps. We humanists are not particurlarly picky, and everything from running shoes to Doc Martens and from pilot jackets to trench coats can be seen around and inside Juslenia. No one will be judged or frowned upon if they fail to follow the colour trends of the season or wear shoes that can’t be found on the pages of Vogue. But what is the right dress code for attending lectures and procrastinating during lunch breaks this spring and autumn 2011? How can you find something that doesn't clash with your mates' clothing? It would be disastrous to sit in a lecture hall, next to a person wearing exactly the same outfit! The hipster look is definitely in and doesn’t seem to pass even if we all wish it did. When the days become sunnier and warmer and all the snow is gone, it’s time to update your wardrobe. Let’s have a look at the absolute hipster must haves for the students of English.
IF YOU'RE A DUDE...
A PAIR OF WHITE CONVERSE ALL STARS
With these, you can’t go wrong. Choose either the high or the low OX-model and preferrably make them look like you’ve had them since 2007 by handling the right bits with a cheese grater or dragging them after you on dusty roads. The more worn out they look, the better. If you prefer a more dressed up look, pointy vintage leather shoes are the right choice for you.
A COUPLE OF LOW V-NECK T-SHIRTS
Each self respecting hipster owns a few of these in different colours. Remember to avoid tacky prints, only cool band prints (e.g. random electro bands like Crystal Castles or Miami Horror) are acceptable. An old school sailor tat on your chest is an absolute pro, but you always have to make sure everyone knows you had yours done long before they became mainstream.
A PAIR OF SKINNY JEANS
Basic blue ones are cool enough, but if you want to go as hipster as possible, you may want to try different colours like pale yellow or light purple. It’s not that much about the colour as it is about the tightness: your skinny jeans must be so tight that they are not going to fit your girlfriend. If you want to go all out and impress the most hipster of hipster, switch the jeans into meggins (short for men's leggins).
AN AMERICAN APPAREL HOODIE
A size too small to show off your small hands. Why wear American Apparel? It's by far the most ethical American clothing brand and they are rare. If a trip to Stockholm to find AA is too much of a drag, also an old jeans shirt or vest cut out of an old jeans jacket will do.
A LEATHER JACKET
The uglier the better. Preferrably brown or any other colour besides black. It also has to be vintage, 80's and 90's models are all that. Avoid biker style jackets though, you don't want to be punk instead of hip.
ACCESSORIES
RayBan Wayfarers or Clubmasters in black or avana (If you happen to be one of those not in the know peoples, for your information, avana is a colour term…). And for cloudy days black nerd classes, with no lenses or ones made of cheap plastic. You know, the ones all the cool retro dudes like Malcom X or Woody Allen wore.
A calculator or otherwise 80’s style digital watch by a Japanese brand.
A big leather manbag to be worn accross the body or casually on the shoulder.
Something retro around your neck. An old VHS-cassette or an 80's Game Boy as a necklace might be a bit clumsy but what evs, it gives you just the right touch.
A fixie bike. This is the ultimate must have for hipsters. Not even old Jopo-bikes are accepted to be cruising about with.
iPhone with the application called Hipstamatic in it: New age fun with a vintage feel.
Top it all up with a ridiculously HOT haircut: shorty short from the sides, but long and wavy on the top. If you're fortunate enough to have your facial hair growing like chest hair in the 1960's German porn movies, a cool moustache is total amazeballs for hipster dudes.
FOR A GIRL...
A PAIR OF DOC MARTENS
As an idea it doesn't seem that girly, but when combined with the things following up, a pair of Martens are essential to your look.
A BUNCH OF VINTAGE DRESSES
Any size, shape or print goes, as long as it is vintage, not bought from charity shops but from vintage boutigues. The dress can be switched into a loose men's flannel shirt used as a dress or with skinny skinny jeans. If you're not into dresses at all, high waisted skinnies can be matched with a ripped t-shirt with a brilliant animal print on it.
A CARDIGAN
Also from your grandma's closet or from vintage boutiques. Have them in solid colours like navy blue, vomit green, shit brown etc. For more dressy situations switch it into a boyfriend-style loose jacket with rolled up sleeves.
A FEW PAIRS OF BROKEN DOWN STOCKINGS
Stockings with no cuts or bruises look so mainstream, and that is what you least want to be. So break them down. Wear two layers of them. Thigh high socks, in the same solid colours as the cardigans or in black, are also encouraged.
ACCESSORIES
- Rayban Wayfarers or Clubmasters and nerd classes are initial for girls too, but this spring, also round John Lennon styled sunglasses have been seen on hipsternesses.
- Hats. Either in the style of Charles Chaplin or Johnny Depp. All kinds and shapes as long as they make you look like an artistic individual.
- Small vintage leather bag. Just big enough to hold your iPhone, credit cards and keys. For uni, use an additional cotton tote to carry your books in. The tote can be plain solid coloured or with spectacular prints like Fairtrade or New Judas Records on it. The point with the tote is to message everyone about your ethical moral and fantastic taste in marginal music.
- Besides some clean, simple long necklaces and an odd number of friendship bracelets around their wrist, or the same retro VHS-stuff as for boys, hipster girls are not big on jewellery. So lose them. You wouldn't want all that jewellery taking the spotlight from your sweet old school tats, would you?
- Dark red lipstick is ESSENTIAL! Wear it at every occasion, even in your sleep, so you'll get practice in how not to get it smudged.
- A single-lens reflex camera, or a Holga, or a Polaroid around your neck. When Hipstamatic on your iPhone isn't enough, you'll have to have a "good" camera ready.
Be prepared, the look alone isn't going to be enough for you to call yourself a hipster. You have to pretend you're into things arty and visual and that you could talk about them forever. This naturally requires going to see new "interesting" art shows, and subscribing to arty mags. Also if possible, leave Uni and apply to study any of the art subjects here in Turku. Who cares about the economy and wherther you end up jobless after grad, the most important thing is to stay hip in the ster.
Avoid American movies. European made art movies are all you're allowed to like. Watch loads and act like you're absolutely passionate about them. If you smoke, never buy a pack of smokes again. It's not that you're not allowed to smoke anymore but from now on you'll have to roll your own fags. You'll look even more like a twat but atleast you'll save money while doing so.
Buy organic food. Not because you can afford it (because probably you can't) or because of your ethical reasons but because you have to. If you're spotted by a fellow scene kid, bending down to grab that can of Euroshopper pea soup or a bottle of Rainbow ketchup from the bottom shelf at your local shop, that'll be the end of your hipstership. Don't come telling me I didn't warn you...
Naturally you'll have to change your scene of friends also. If you're having trouble finding hipster friends to share your coolness and individualiness with, I suggest you try Bar Kuka and Club Dynamo. During the summer there are massive get togethers for people as individual as you, like Turku Modern and Flow festivals. So don't be alone and drown in the mainstream! When attending these big festivals, your look has to be hipsperfect: The goal is to get yourself featured on hel-looks.com with other "superbly fashionable" people.
